Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
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