conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
So vagazzling was a success
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
Randomize
