First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
