i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
