what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
Randomize
