coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Randomize
