WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
I licked your asshole in confidence.
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
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