ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
