I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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