my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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