Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
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