is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
Randomize