im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
