fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
So vagazzling was a success
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Randomize