I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
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