U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
How's work?
Spinning.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
Last night: Repeatedly yelled about how the fishbowl tasted like blue, stole a stranger's hat, hugged the DJ for playing my request, made out with my roommate, and abandoned the guy I dragged to the club in the first place
This morning: Hat doesn't fit, hangover headache is blue, and I can't move without getting lightheaded
Listen when they tell you not to drink after giving blood
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize
