Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Randomize
