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• (734): View more from Michigan

  Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week

  Fav 7 1102 1497

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• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him

  Fav 11 1157 1173

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• (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.

  Fav 22 750 3540

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• (573): View more from Missouri

  how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?

  Fav 7 3506 857

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• (203): View more from Connecticut

  i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.

  Fav 13 975 4635

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• (208): View more from Idaho

  Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?

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• (317): View more from Indiana

  I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.

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• (614): View more from Ohio

  I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.

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• (954): View more from Florida

  Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.

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• (406): View more from Montana

  She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial

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• (410): View more from Maryland

  IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS

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• (443): View more from Maryland

  Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with

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• (239): View more from Florida

  I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost

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• (810): View more from Michigan

  Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!

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• (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Never joke about your clitoris.

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