Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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