Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
