the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Randomize
