She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
