I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
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