airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
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