yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
