That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
