somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
i can't believe i had my finger in that
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Randomize
