Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Randomize
