My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
Randomize
