some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
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