Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
