we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
