i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Enjoy the penises
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
