Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Randomize
