It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
Randomize
