Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
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