in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
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