she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
That's how pantless uber rides happen
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Randomize
