Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
