It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
