Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Randomize
