My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
Randomize
