What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
I think a kid would responsible me up
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
