I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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