The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Randomize