OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
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