Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize