I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
