ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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