I cut my penus on the lid.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Randomize