And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
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