You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize
